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Grades 4–5 · First Screens · Badge 3

What the phone is for

Agree with a parent, in writing, what the phone is for and what it is not.

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Step 1 of 9

1Look

The argument nobody wrote down

Still image

Kitchen, nine at night

A kid and a parent at a kitchen table, a phone between them, both talking at once. Nothing written down anywhere.

Both of them are sure what was agreed. They are sure of different things.

2The idea

Why it goes on paper

Every phone argument is the same one. You remember the deal one way, they remember it another, and there is nothing to check, so it turns into who is louder. Writing it down is not about trust. It is so there is something to point at. Pointing ends arguments. Remembering starts them.

A written deal protects you too. If it says an hour after homework, then it says that, and nobody gets to change it because they are in a mood or the dishwasher broke. You can hold them to it exactly as much as they can hold you to it.

3The idea

The five lines

A deal you can keep is short. Five lines, one page, two signatures at the bottom.
1. What it is for, and what it is not. Family, maps, music, homework. Not: whatever, whenever.
2. When it is off. A time, not a feeling.
3. Where it sleeps. A room that is not your bedroom.
4. If it breaks or gets lost. Who pays, what happens next.
5. The telling promise. Telling a parent about something bad never costs you the phone.

The first line does the most work. Apps change every month; a list of allowed apps is out of date by Friday. What the phone is for does not change, and every argument about a new app can be settled by reading line one.

4The idea

Sam's deal, line by line

Here is one, filled in. 1. For messaging family and friends, maps, music, and homework. Not for scrolling in bed or at the table. 2. Off at 8.30 on school nights, 9.30 at weekends. 3. Charges in the kitchen. 4. If it breaks, Sam pays half from pocket money; if it is lost, no phone until it is found or replaced. 5. Telling Mum or Dad about something bad never costs Sam the phone.

Two names at the bottom, dated, on the fridge. When Sam wants a new app in March, nobody argues. They read line one. Does it fit family, maps, music or homework? If yes, fine. If no, that is the deal saying no, not a parent in a mood.

5Say it

A better opening than asking for more time

Say this to a parent when you sit down

“Can we write down what the phone is for?”

It nearly always gets a yes. Nobody has ever argued with a kid for wanting the rules in writing.

6Decide

Which of these belongs at the top of a phone deal?

Right. Line one. Apps change every month; what the phone is for does not. That one line settles every new-app argument for a year.

Too vague, or too long. “Be sensible” means whatever the person reading it wants it to mean, which is exactly the argument you are trying to avoid. And a list of every app is out of date by Friday. Line one is what it is for.

Pick one to carry on.

7Build it

Fill in the phone deal

Interactive

The phone deal

The five lines as five blanks to fill in with a parent: what it is for, when it is off, where it sleeps, what happens if it breaks, and the telling promise. It prints on one page with two signature lines.

Do the blanks with a parent, not for them. Both names go on the bottom.

8Find them

Which of these should the deal actually say?

Tap the ones that count.

Find all 4.

9Do it

Before you leave this page

Print or write out the deal and sign it with a parent tonight. Both signatures. Stick it somewhere you both walk past every day.

Tick it when you have done it.

Lesson done.

A deal you both signed beats an argument you both remember differently.

Next lesson: Where it sleeps

Badge 3 · Your Phone Deal

3.1What the phone is for 3.2Where it sleeps 3.3Telling without losing it ★Badge Challenge

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